Monday, August 30, 2010

Masochism

As a human being, I think that a certain tolerance for pain is something all people should develop. However, as a cross country runner I know that what we do is fracking nuts, and if you can't find some way to honestly enjoy your own suffering you quit.

Masochism is one of the most helpful ways to be crazy. It may even top paranoia, since chances are everyone around you is too self centered to actually be out to get you in this day and age.

Just to point out, that last bit was much more comforting in my head.

Wait, back on topic. All runners are crazy. It's the only way anyone could run five point six miles before breakfast knowing that there are two more runs that day. Everyone who runs has to be able to say "I'm going to do this even though it hurts so much that everyone else would quit, and most people wouldn't start in the first place."

Another thing- never confuse cross country running with Track. Track is for whimps. Running a single mile on a flat surface, and they think that's a big deal? Track is a sport for people who can't hack it in cross country, and people who are using it to help train for cross country. Real runners go for miles not yards, and we do it in forests and mountains away from the cheers of spectators.


Masochists take no comfort in those motivational childrens' stories. Puffing up a hill saying I Think I Can doesn't do a thing. Bursting up an incline eyes wild with a battle cry loose on your lips is what it's all about. Actually, no. But it's a fun image.

Oh, and then there's the tortoise and the hare. Let's get something straight here for all those supporting Team Tortoise- slow and steady doesn't win the race. Fast wins the race.

In fact, the mark of a good runner is that after a meet, they vomit. As the saying goes "If you're puking your guts out, you're running your heart out." Real runners make it across that line then veer off to the left (or right, where ever is out of camera range) to jettison all the carbs that had weighed them down. Is it disgusting? Oh, yes it is. But secretly we all want to do well enough to puke.

Another mark of a apt athlete is running with an injury. All preventative measures aside, when you run thirteen miles in eight hours things get shifty. Especially, in the knees ankles and arches. Generally the only thing to do when you get hurt is take it easy so it doesn't get worse... As if that'll happen. You don't get to the point of throwing up by taking it easy!

As I read over this post, I realize that this sport is fit only for the twisted, but I never want to stop.
- Mind you, I just spent a week training in the mountains and had to take yesterday off running so that my left knee and right arch were fit to stand on. Still though. My sport doesn't play games. We run meets. And what we lack in fun we make up for in masochistic satisfaction.

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